SANTA MONICA, CA – Activision have given the video gaming press an early look at their latest music game Vuvuzela Hero, set for launch this holiday season.
Vuvuzela Hero will see gamers take up the role of an annoying football fan, blowing your vuvuzela over existing Guitar Hero tracks, ruining the listening experience for all those around you. CEO Bobby Kotick hailed the game as a ‘revolution in testing human tolerance’.
Vuvuzela Hero looks set to set the bar in ear aching gaming experiences, delivering unprecedented sound innovation with the potential to piss off listeners almost as much as two alley cats fighting over the last fish bone outside your window.
Activision are already anticipating 5 million sales and an equal number of police cautions for noise pollution violations worldwide as gamers look to recreate the World Cup viewing experience over their favourite tracks. To promote the launch of the title, Activision have planned a ‘VuvuFest’ inside a derelict Toyota dealership where vuvuzelas will be played all night long. Non-stop.
Early previews have been glowing with journalists stunned at the authenticity of the game. “I was actually in South Africa and sat next to people who would blow this thing for an entire match. Listening to the guys in the office play this is the closest I’ve come to punching a someone in the face since. They’ve recreated the experience very well” raved one journalist who wished to remain anonymous.
“It’s a really solid product, they just need to get the pricing right” was the line from IGN. “How much would I pay to be constantly annoyed by the sound of an instrument that only plays one note really badly? Probably around 99 bucks. I think that’s the sweet spot.”
Activision have issued the following press release:
“Santa Monica, CA – July 7, 2010 – When the World cup is over, a new generation of tone deaf horn blowers will come together and blow with Activision, Inc.’s (Nasdaq: ATVI) Vuvuzela Hero® Legend of Africa, combining the most annoying national instrument known to man with revolutionary new online and offline gameplay modes. The game comes with 4 newly redesigned vuvuzelas moulded from authentic Chinese factory plastic capable of one, maybe two different notes at a stretch in addition to the sense of obliviousness that allows players to be completely unaware of the suffering they’re causing to others around them.
We’ve listen to the fans over this fantastic soccer tournament and realised that since everyone was talking about the vuvuzela we may as well incorporated into our game for your purchasing pleasure. The game features the same Guitar Hero songs you know and love, but with the annoying, continuous and completely monotone sound of the vuvuzela played over each track. You’ll enjoy the biggest selection of vuvuzela tracks including the one were the vuvuzela just goes on and on and on you think to yourself ‘if I ever met the guy blowing that vuvuzela I would shove it down his throat’. This is certainly a game best played in front of your family while they are trying to have quiet time or contemplate the days events in peace.
Vuvuzela Hero® Legend of Africa will be out this fall for the Xbox 360, PS3 and Wii from Neversoft. The game is not yet rated by the ESRB.”