Reality TV “Setting Unrealistic Standards For Nation’s Skanks”

WASHINGTON D.C – A new report has strongly hinted that a new breed of reality television shows are setting unrealistic levels of skankiness for the nation’s skanks.

The 10 year study by Pew Research Center claims programmes like A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, Real Housewives and Jersey Shore perpetuate a level of skank-like behaviour that is not attainable by the everyday skank.

Researchers blasted network executives for “portraying an image no ordinary skank could hope to live up to in two lifetimes.”

Unrealistic standards

Leader of the study Justine Matheson believes there is a “massive gap” between what skanks see on television and what they were able to do to lower their own standards in a typical 24 hour period.

“How are they supposed to find the time to spit in another skanks face like the ones on tv?” Questioned Mrs Matheson who also said not only do reality shows set unrealistic standards, but they cause skanks to turn on other skanks.

According to the survey, skanks who view reality TV regularly are more focused on the physical appearance of the skank in closest proximity whether a prior relationship exists or not.

72 percent say they spend a lot of time pulling extensions out vs 42 percent of non-viewers.

Network bosses hit back at the reports and suggested there was no law saying skanks needed to match up to everything they see on reality shows.

“No one is saying the average skank has to throw up in public or perform sexual acts in a hot tub on cue.  No one is saying that.”

“What we show is the aspirational picture of skank behaviour that should in no way be taken for the norm.”

No competition

However, Mrs Matheson stood by the study’s findings.

“Skanks today are bombarded with reality TV that more portrays skanks in competition with one another rather than in support or collaboration.”

“This perpetuates a stereotype and normalizes this behavior among skank that is hard the achieve in the real world,” she states.

“We don’t want skanks to avoid reality TV, no one is saying that.”

“But want them to know what they are getting into when they watch it.”

“It’s tell skanks that they have to sleep with a nameless celebrity for 15 minutes fame or they’re not true skanks.”

“And what kind of message is that?”

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