Peace Talks Between Chris Brown and Drake “In Tatters”

NEW YORK – UN Special envoy Kofi Annan has called on Chris Brown and Drake to re-enter negotiations after initial peace talks broke down this week.

The desperate plea came just hours after both camps failed once again to agree a ceasefire following an outbreak of violence last week.

Even today, there was no indication that further talks had advanced Annan’s six mic peace plan since the conflict began in the heavily populated area of New York club.

Warzone

Hangers on say nearly six people were mildly hurt in the province of W.i.P nightclub after pro-Drake forces initiated sustained bottle fire towards Chris Brown loyalists.

One witness described the scenes as “bananas yo,” and was forced to flee the scene in order to seek refuge in Diddy’s house until the skirmish was over.

Mr Annan looks to have a tough time ahead of him as neither side appears willing to agree to scale back aggressions.

Indeed, very few observers expected that the veteran diplomat would secure a quick breakthrough in crisis as it moves into its second week.

This was demonstrated by recent footage released on Twitter showing a gash to Chris Brown’s chin.  The footage has yet to be independently verified, but experts agreed that Kofi Annan was facing more of an uphill battle than Soulja Boy trying to produce another decent single.

“I think the risk for him is going into negotiations without the necessary support on both sides,” concluded a staff member from  New York based think tank XXL Magazine.

“Drake ‘n them see no reason to talk with Chris so long as they control the highly sought after strategic regions of Rihanna.”

Still optimistic

Senior Young Money rapper Lil Wayne has urged the UN to set a deadline for Mr Annan’s peace plan, mumbling a sentence that sounded vaguely like “there should be no more stalling”.

He continued his description of the situation, but could not be understood so fellow label mate Mack Maine was forced to issue an emotional plea on his behalf.

Despite failing to win peace, Kofi Annan left the Chris Brown camp declaring he was optimistic that a peace process could take place.

“It’s going to be tough.  It’s going to be difficult,” the former UN Secretary General told reporters in Brown’s front yard.

“If someone threw a bottle at me I’d be pissed too, but we have to have hope a resolution can still be found.”