Syrian President: The Villas-Boas Reign Is Now Untenable

SYRIA – Bashar al Assad has launched a scathing attack on Chelsea boss Andre Villas-Boas, calling for a swift end to his managerial reign before he does more damage to the club.

Following the London side’s mid-week defeat in the Champion’s League, the Syrian President and substitute geography teacher demanded Villas-Boas step down gracefully now or be subject to tough economic sanctions.

“His time is now over,” said Assad on state television.  “Believe me, I know what a failed regime looks like.”

‘Chelsea Chelsea’

Assad indicated a number of problems with team selection but highlighted the decision to drop Frank Lampard, Ashley Cole and Micheal Essien before a crucial Champions League game as “utterly reprehensible”.

“Is this man out of his mind?!  There is no way one can make such damaging decisions and expect to still have a job by the end of the season.”

The Syrian president feared not enough was being done to protect innocent season ticket holders who were being subjected to an endless torment of what he called “brutally inept management decisions”, claiming he had never seen so many people continuously forced to suffer at the hands of one man.

Assad demanded Villas-Boas stand down and hand power to a transitional backroom staff to oversee first team affairs until an elected manager could be appointed for the 2012-2013 season.

“Sometimes you just have to get rid to the bad influences as soon as they become a problem.”

Harsh assessment

In response to coverage of the ongoing Chelsea crisis, Assad criticised journalists for “empty words” that made for good headlines but “did nothing to form a binding resolution to ensure the departure of Villas-Boas” and demanded tougher action be taken to save Chelsea’s season.

He suggested that if no action was taken before the return fixtures at Stamford Bridge he would move for a UEFA backed resolution to remove the 34-year-old from his post.

“Without firm binding action soon I fear we will see this man take a once proud footballing institution to an unacceptable low.”

He ended his scathing assessment by chanting:  “You don’t know what you’re doing!  You don’t know what you’re doing!  Na na na na!”

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.


*


This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.