CONNECTICUT – The world of professional wrestling entertainment has been stunned by news CEO Vince McMahon has been found guilty of pre-arranging the outcome of ‘thousands’ of matches dating back to the 1980’s.
The verdict comes after a sting operation uncovered a range of damning evidence ranging from pulled punches and fake blood. Inside sources have also testified that getting hit with a chair “doesn’t hurt as much as we lead you to believe it does.”
Not a stranger to accusation of match-fixing, a court has now confirmed allegations that several WWE matches have been determined in advance by Mr McMahon and his affiliates.
Suspicions confirmed
McMahon initially denied the charges in 2010 saying: “I guaran-damn-tee this sport is clean!”
But after deliberating for nearly 17 hours, a jury unanimously determined that a sport in which middle-aged men physically compete with people half their age “probably ain’t legit”.
“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” said wrestling fan Johnny Simpson, 38. “If you told me yesterday it was all a sham I would have drop-kicked you right there. I can’t believe what I’m hearing.”
Some superstars were in favour of the verdict however. After the decision, The Rock excitedly announced: “FINALLY! McMahon, has been brought…to justice.”
Many now believe the sport has suffered an ‘irreversible’ loss of credibility as serious doubt has now been cast over the validity of past results. Mr MacMahon has been given the prospect of a lengthy spell in jail or telling millions of rabid fans their favourite sport was not real.
MacMahon is expected to choose jail.
‘Rampant corruption’
An anonymous source on record as assisting prosecution was said to be happy about the decision, but concerned that the scale of match-fixing in the sport meant that it could have come to late.
” This whole thing is rigged!” Blasted the veteran who claimed the verdict was “no surprise” since “I was in this game for years and had to take a fall almost every other week.”
He later added: “Woooooooooo!”
Following the verdict, judge Frank Conway issued a statement warning WWE athletes of future conduct.
In it, he said: “I hope that this verdict is a further warning to any individual who might, for whatever reason, seek to slam a steel chair into the forehead of another and not mean it.”
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