Colonel Gaddafi Demands Sheen Role In Two And A Half Men

LIBYA – Colonel Gaddafi has launched a ferocious promotional campaign against Warner Bros studios, demanding to be considered as Charlie Sheen’s replacement on Two and a Half Men.

In his speech, he rubbished claims that Charlie Sheen has ‘outcrazied’ him in recent weeks and an opening on the show as an opportunity to prove ‘once and for all’ who has lost more of a grip on reality.

The Libyan leader was defiant in his rhetoric, promising to behave in even more sociopathic ways as he seeks to prove he can best the troubled star who was fired after testing positive for Charlie Sheen.

He also threatened the west if they tried to interfere in potential contract negotiations for the part.

Audition

A successful campaign would see him take on the role as the over-aged, carefree, belligerent individual living a life seemingly without responsibility or consequence.

Should he get the part, It is uncertain whether he would continue in his current role as an over-aged, carefree, belligerent individual living a life seemingly without responsibility or consequence who is also a brutal dictator.

The Libyan leader appeared in increasingly confident mood and showed no sign of willingness to compromise or talk about the other candidates for the position.

“Talk about them – what for?” he questioned.  “They are not insane like me.  They have no chance, the part is mine.  For sure, for sure.”  He then added: “My people love me,” before punching his fist in the air and yelling words yet to be translated into anything that makes sense in any language.

‘Like for like replacement’

Having given at least as many rambling non-sensical television interviews as Sheen, many observers have wondered what more the anti-democracy advocate had to do to receive a phone call from studio executives.

Gaddafi’s campaign has even been backed by cast members Jon Cryer and Angus T. Jones who play ‘the other guy’ and ‘the kid’ respectively.  Jones was certain that Gaddafi possessed all the  characteristics to ensure a smooth transition into a ninth – and no way unnecessary – season.

Gaddafi lack of acting credentials could present a risk as would his recurring habit of killing off any and all that oppose him.  Cryer however, was sure that it would not be a problem as “Charlie never did any acting on the show anyway.”

“And they both look like they’ve been partying all night.  In fact, the only thing they don’t have in common is Platoon.”

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