LAS VEGAS – Former Welterweight Champion Ricky Hatton rolled back the years last night, showing fire in the belly by successfully unifying a bucket of KFC with a Popeyes Chicken and Biscuits family meal in the “City of Second Chances”. It’s the first time the UK boxer has managed such a victory and represents Hatton’s most successful showing on US soil.
In a dazzling display of speed, determination and gut, ‘The Hitman’ gave an awesome demonstration of hunger that has not deteriorated with age and if anything had been sharpened to an edge fine enough to sheer meat from a crispy drumstick, say spectators.
Extraordinary performance
“From start to finish he just dominated that chicken. We thought he was buying for everyone but boy, were we wrong,” a close friend commented. “I think Ricky could go on from here and unify a Big Mac with a Double Whopper tomorrow.”
Former promoter Frank Warren said the technical ability required to combine a bucket of Popeyes with a bucket of KFC in a single sitting was an achievement that should be applauded by all.
“I haven’t seen Ricky put on a show like that since he downed 11 pints of Guinness in a row. He made it look easy too, the only sweat he broke was a meat sweat.”
Hours after the bout and customers at both fast food chains remained stunned: “I thought he was done when he bought that KFC bucket. But when he spotted the Popeyes across the street…his eyes lit up and I knew then that he would not stop until he unified those meals inside of him.
“His determination was the difference maker tonight,” noted Warren who added: “His footwork to duck in an out of traffic and get to that Popeyes was Ali-like. And the agility to find an open space in what was an already packed restaurant and just attack the buckets was out of this world.”
‘He simply tore his opponent apart’
Usually known for a leaky defence, Hatton is said to have fiercely guarded both buckets and was ‘not afraid to get in close when the situation called for it’. Customers in the vicinity of this masterpiece also remarked on the power displayed to force his way past customers already in line and make his order.
“It was his jab that amazed me,” recalls one friend there on the historical night. “When I tried to reach for a piece, his arm shot straight out to cut me off. He kept four of us back that night, his defence was so tight.”
Paying customers were already spreading the tale of power that saw Ricky Hatton continue eating way past 12 rounds, going back for a Double Down sandwich and biscuits. “He stumbled in the 7th and I’ll admit, I thought he’d go down. But he just burped and kept on going. I’ve never seen anything like it, he was on another level tonight.”
Popeyes staff were impressed by the Hitman’s vision of the arena most of all. Cashier Ryan Yates agreed that given the fact Hatton had not visited previously, “he knew exactly where the mustard and ketchup sachets were without asking and didn’t hesitate to grab hold of some when needed.”
Tonight’s performance will undoubtedly lead to renewed talk of a possible show down between Hatton and the Pillsbury Dough Boy as he seeks to dominate the entire American fast food heavyweight division.
“I think he really wanted to make a statement you know: ‘this is my chicken and you can’t have any’.”
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