World Leaders Convene For G8 Afterparty

TORONTO, CANADA – David Cameron has urged ‘tight focus’ on preparations for the G8 afterparty – his first as Prime Minister – to ensure it would be as ‘on and popping’ as previous years. Western leaders will today meet in a surprise Toronto venue to party like it’s 1999, and Mr Cameron plans to ensure they follow through on that promise. “The question is will it deliver.” the PM told Canada’s Globe newspaper “I’ve heard much about these parties, but too often they fail to live up to the hype”.

Party preperations have been troubled by arguments over financing, as leaders from poorer nations demand confirmation they would still be able to get in free. With all nations still battle economic uncertainty, it’s thought the number of Dom Perignon bottles will be scaled back, and plans for several dancer poles to be installed inside the venue – initially resisted by German chancellor Angela Merkel – may be cut completely.

US Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner warned that the world could not depend only on America to pull the party together. “We just don’t have the resources to organise everything” he said. “I wanted the dancer girls as much as anyone, but we’re dealing with a recession”. It has also since been confirmed that another nation will need to pay the DJ this year.

President Barack Obama remained confident the G8 would pull together and put on a night to remember. “Our job is to make sure we get it crunk tonight, and that’s what we’re going to do” he said before a crucial meeting with uncooperative G20 leaders in an attempt to get them to loosen up and have some fun.

Iranian President Mahmood Ahemedinejad again refused invitations as he is believed to be already planning a secret afterparty with Kim Jong-Il in a Tehran nuclear facility.

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