Katie Holmes Letter Calms Fears Over Safety


BEVERLEY HILLS, CA – A letter from actress Katie Holmes has calmed fears over her well being and safety after years of marriage to Tom Cruise.  The letter came attached to a photo of Holmes with a recent copy of USA Today and claims she is doing ‘just fine’.  She writes she is eating daily at regular intervals and is happy to be with such a ‘super’ actor.  The letter comtained numerous assurances that she is not being held against her will and a request not to disturb the ‘super time me and Tom are having’.  It was also signed in red ink.

Despite this personal statement, handwriting experts have called into question the authenticity of the letter after comparing it with wedding invitations written by Holmes.  “If you look at samples taken from the invitations, you’ll notice handwriting that is unsteady and even shaky in places” demonstrated analyst Dennis Matthews.  “This is a textbook example of penmanship under duress.  This new letter is more confident however, like every word was thought out beforehand.  I couldn’t say they were written by the same person.”

Residents in Holmes’ Ohio hometown say they are just delighted to hear from the former Dawsons Creek star, ignoring experts concerns .  “Oh, forget these so called experts.  It was signed wasn’t it?”  questioned Holmes’ mother. “It’s been so long since we’ve heard from her after the marriage.  Those two love birds must have been busy.”

The timing of Holmes’ letter is seen as crucial as many fans had prompted local authorities to investigate after growing concerns over her safety.  “We were going to go looking for her, then this letter shows up”  an officer told ML News “It seemed like a strange coincidence, but we’re just glad she’s OK.”

Mr Cruise was not available for comment.

Leave a Reply